Defying Gravity...

More and more these days I feel like I'm not what I always wanted to be. I feel like I should be more than I am, better than I am.

I used to think that I was never going to be anything, but then I found music and that all changed. Music opened up a whole new world for me, a world that excepted and loved me. But with everything that has happend lately in like choir and with the shows it just feels like I've lost the music. I know that may sound silly but when the only thing you feel like you have in life is music and the stage then you see how important it really is.

I just want to be back to where I used to be, back to where I thought that someday I could really reach my dreams...what is the point of life if I don't get to do what I love? I don't want to wake up everyday and hate my life...even if I don't make it shouldn't I at least try? But am I even good enough to try? Would I have it in me to take all that comes with trying to get there? I'm just not sure if I'm as strong as I used to be...I'm not sure if I'm even the same person I used to be...

I have felt like something in my life is missing...maybe its that part of me that knew I could do anything.